Quickening

May 8-sunny, breezy, weather perfection

Finally, the nausea won. Twice. Also, the exhaustion and lackadaisical self is also winning. Motivation=0. But enough of that.

I felt the baby move two days ago. At 9 weeks five days, it should be impossible. The earliest I've heard of people feeling movement is 11 weeks, which is still early. But it was unmistakable after already having two kids, both of which I felt early as well. Since then, I've felt movement a few more times, never for more than about 45 seconds.

Certainly, there is magick in Quickening. In *feeling* that baby's first recognizable thumps and wiggles. Those feet that will eventually kick soccer balls letting mama know for the first time that there is absolutely life within her, stirring and developing. From what I read, the fetus's brain isn't really connected to intentional movement at this point; it's mostly neurological impulses setting up their pathways and testing them out. I'm okay with that...I mean, it's better than thinking baby's first instincts are to kick the hell out of me ;)

It was amazing to lay on the bed at 1am, feeling the little bumps, waiting on the next one, wishing it would continue for longer. Then the next night, willing the little thing to start thumping around, only to fall asleep having felt nothing, knowing there will be a time when I'll feel them every night.

I think *this* is what I've been waiting for. Sure it's fantastic to get to tell everyone, to get the baby bump, to not just look pudgy. But really, those first feelings that I'm not going to miscarry, that this baby really is in there and will be a part of our family soon, come with Quickening. It's when I, as carrier of this life within me, feel a response from the other part of this amazing bond.

Amazing what a few tiny thumps can do.